Need to release thoughts but to let go without resolution is so tough. Can pick up and put down bro, can pick up can put down.
- Made scrambled eggs, toast and bacon a good many times these few weeks and realise I can probably only manage 1 or 2 variables changing during each attempt. Today’s change was doing 9 eggs vs 3 and throwing some mushrooms into the mix.
- Realising “practice makes perfect” is obvious but having the opportunity to practice is equally important, allowing you to experience the effect of changing different variables and settling into a workflow.
- This leads us to the next question, how do I insert more opportunities to practice “insert-skill-here” more often? This is probably the toughest to realise and do, requiring one-level-up thinking and behaviour.
I’m okay with being lost.
I don’t have to know where I’m going, or how I’m going to get wherever. I don’t have to worry about when I’ll see whoever and when I’ll earn whatever.
Just had a friend tell me he was feeling lost in life and I kinda realised that I imagine myself to have progressed past that point but I really haven’t progressed, I only changed my attitude to being lost. Happily lost I would say, but taking care to ensure that my attitude and direction are correct and moving slowly toward an indeterminate goal.
I didn’t manage to reflect upon 2014 because it just wasn’t high on my to-do list, I realised I also missed 2013. Upon hindsight, I think it is important to take a look at how I performed my obligations this year and what can be improved.
First, here’s my year in photos just like I did in 2012. I decided to pick one photo a month. Too many things happened this year and I’m thankful for all of it.
I think January was a most peculiar month. I was probably a few months into my new job. I think I am surrounded by exactly who I need. These pictures remind me of the state of relationships and unlike pictures, the memories hold much more depth and detail. I am not sure what else went on but I remember enough to make me appreciate the way things are now.
In February I mostly took out my camera at cafes and social gatherings. I think I spent a lot of time and money at cafes with people. I picked out photos with some significance to jog my own memory in future, pardon me if they are not interesting to you.
March was a pretty interesting month photo-wise. It had the wedding of the year for me definitely, had quite a lot of fun. I also did 2 other shoots. One pre-wedding and one actual day. I think I must have spent many hours this month processing photos.
April was quiet photo-wise.
YX went overseas quite a bit. Some more cafe and Coffee!
June camp happened, some side-project progress, life-changing sushi.
This was a crazy happening month. Friends got wedded, more cafe-ing, Rocher Died, yeah, crazy month.
This was my birthday month. Many celebrations, staycation, everything was made special by everyone!
YX’s turn to be the birthday girl
Family trip to Penang was the highlight of this month!
Some thoughts on the year ahead
- Not enough goals and milestones to measure my progress, leading to me feeling like I didn’t achieve anything. Shall document more in 2015
- Even less talk, more doing
- More doing what I’m supposed to do when I’m supposed to do it
- More purpose-ful-ness, meaning more planning and more thinking about life-goals and targets
- Sleeping earlier
I know somewhere in some corner of the globe someone is fighting for his/her life. Could be against disease, against other people, could be just against the ongoing nature of time. It seems so self indulgent and almost wasteful to even entertain the thought that my life is unsatisfying and tiresome when another person would give anything for a day more with his loved ones, to see another sunrise, to never grow old or to see their child grow up. Perhaps at this point I feel nothing is important to me and nothing I’m doing now is really important to me as well.
I’m still still standing in motion, waiting for the next wave. Getting a little impatient.. There must be more that just this..
Today a chunk of glass, brushed aluminum and electronics came in the mail. I noticed how cold and lifeless it seemed, devoid of character, identity and purpose. That was a little depressing.
Then i realised how much I like how physical objects grow on me as I use them more and more. This is the first chapter ready to be written.
Looking forward to the next few years of creating, consuming and entertaining ahead.